It was my day off work, so I decided to go for a stroll. An older man wearing a scarf was walking behind me. All of a sudden, he quickened his pace, trying to catch up. Once he was within earshot, he began speaking rapidly, almost as if he were confessing a crime.
“You know, I’ve been thinking all morning,” he said, breathless, “that maybe I’m not supposed to be the person I’ve been pretending to be. I mean—what if everyone can see right through me? What if they already know?”
His words tumbled out in uneven fragments, as though he feared they might rot if left unsaid. I quickened my step, unsure whether he was talking to me, to himself, or to the empty street. But he matched my pace, almost eagerly, continuing his rapid monologue.
“I found an abandoned shopping list at the bottom of a grocery store cart,” he said. “It was yellow, wrinkled, written on graph paper. I felt a strange urge to rescue that lonely, somewhat worn-out scrap of paper, so I picked it up, smoothed it a little, and slipped it into the back pocket of my trousers, hidden from everyone’s sight. A wave of guilt washed over me, though I don’t really know why—after all, I wasn’t stealing anything. And yet, I felt like a thief. What would I have said if someone had asked, ‘Why did you take that piece of paper?’ How would I have justified these odd impulses of mine?”
He slipped the paper from his pocket and showed it to me.
CUCUMBER
TOMATOES
LETTUCE
BREAD T AND V
COLD CUTS
COOKING CREAM
DICED HAM
GRATED CHEESE
PORRIDGE
YOGURT
MILK
MEAT PIE
HAMBURGER
SAUSAGES
“Everything is written in capital letters. Bread T and V seems strangely mysterious,” he said. “What do you think it all means?”
I had no idea what the man was talking about, so I kept nodding as if I were listening, all the while trying to get away from him. He then bowed and thanked me, producing a paper napkin which he pressed into my hands.
“Please have this as a gift. I’ve been keeping this in my heart for a long time now. I feel so much lighter!” he said, and then he rushed off.
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